So the weekend before my last post, I stubbed my toe while I was cleaning the house. Then right after I wrote the post, I rolled my ankle on my ex's uneven kitchen floor - same foot. Turned out that toe was broken. So any chance of getting off my butt and moving went out the window, not to mention I'd thrown my back out for the first time in my life - thanks 50! - so had been even more of a slug. Finally started feeling better and then I cut my finger with the hedge trimmer on the first real spring-like day. Off to urgent care for stitches, thankfully, and nothing worse. Well, except the tetanus shot to go with it. I mowed the lawn for the first time and got sick from breathing in all the pollen, so back to no working out. To sum up, when I went to my annual well woman exam this past Monday, I had gained the 10 lbs back plus 5 more.
I've been really worried about the weight because I've been reading a book about how obesity is the underlying cause not only of diabetes, but also heart disease and cancer. Obviously with heart disease being a factor in my family history, I want to get on top of it. Then I went to my mammogram this morning. I felt uneasy as soon as I got there. They wanted to do an additional ultrasound after the mammo which has been standard for me for the last 7 years; I have an area of dense tissue on my left breast. Todays ultrasound was a little odd - the tech asked me to hum. That was new. And concerning. When she came back in after I got dressed, the radiologist was with her, and I knew. He said there's a spot next to that dense tissue that didn't look good and he's pretty sure it's cancerous. They'll do a biopsy, hopefully next week, and we'll get a plan on treatment once we know what we're dealing with.
I'm all cried out tonight. I was mad and sad and scared all morning. I texted my closest friends asking for prayers that 1) it turns out to be nothing, and 2) if it is something, I can continue to work full-time and take care of the kids. They have rallied around me. I'm so blessed to have them in my life.
I'm going to wait to say anything to the kids until there's more information. If I can wait until school gets out, I will - it's S's freaking senior year. She doesn't need this extra stress going into finals, and I want her to enjoy celebrating graduation. And R is going to nationals for forensics. Want them to be able to get through this last normal month of school.
